I'm on page 4.
Im on beer infinity
I am going to get arrested. I am yelling fuck repeatedly, wearing a Bird jersey and polka dot pants while pounding wine. Amazing mug shot to follow.
I'm using the size of your dick as a guage to see how big something is on Amazon. Any questions?
I slept with him that night and I'm not sure if my lack of enthusiasm was obvious but I found him eating ice cream in the bathtub the next morning. Mom will be so proud.
Just to warn you I probably wont be able to do anything that involves standing up
I'm watching a man in drag spread food products on his face my life is spiraling out of control.
Who knew you could get a drunk in public when jogging with your dog?
I want to be the sort of person he can respect in the morning once the drugs wear off.
i think the last part kind of negates the first part there
So our trip to Disney World ended in the three of us stripping at a gay club in orlando.
I think were only still together so we can make each other miserable
I think you're my feminist conscience sometimes.
I've had more orgasms than showers this week.
Oh BTW the next time I see you I don't care where we are your dick will be going into some part of my body.
it's your last night here, let's make it one we may or may not remember.
Nobody cheats on THIS.
Randomize
