I just broke up with my girlfriend lets go find strippers that need rent money.
East Village: Only place you can play pac man while eating a pineapple hotdog, go to the bar next door and see a graphic blowjob on every tv
I love being friends with rich people. I get laid by association.
And no, shaving doesn't make it look bigger, either
my cup is half full, half full of rum.
I'm gonna have sex with a woman...help
He had a curved dick....must be a european thing
I'm going to get like 25 drinks at their wedding and just leave them sitting around or give them to hobos.
It's like a toaster oven for my penis
She just texted me that she's horny, then started quoted random music, then telling me everything she regrets. I don't think there's enough tequila in the world for me to deal with her...
Prob because you've thrown up alot. As long as its not like pure blood you're fine. Drink water.
the other day i was so high i found pages and pages of pictures of HD hamburgers and patriotic music. bong rips for merica.
Giving the guy pizza was a good idea. Leaving him naked on the pool table makes you my hero
No I feel the same as usual. Mopey with a chance of bitch fits.
Just got an x-ray done of my hip and you can clearly see the outline of my penis in it. When the doctor saw it she said "wow I haven't seen one that big on an x-ray before." Pretty sure the doc and the nurses are going to be talking about me on their lunch break.
Randomize
