i just had sex. the condom broke. we're sleeping in to separate beds. And im in albany
His texts read Like a 15 year olds diary.
she chased the tour bus screaming I BET YOUR DICK IS THE SIZE OF YOUR MICROPHONE STAND. i think its safe to say were never getting vip passes again.
Its not college unless your study breaks were to go throw up from blacking out the night before
Just called my dad drunk from bed to ask for bacon.. my niece texted me when it was ready.. i'm never moving out
Jail is not for me. They portion control your meals and I don't really like that.
Going to be a long day. text me later. Sorry I puked in your sink.
A place where it's acceptable to show body parts is not a good place for me to be.
I would go a lot of places to get laid. But I would NOT go to Staten Island.
Sorry you felt insulted last night let me rub your butt in remorse
Come over so I can fuck you louder than her country music
Of course that's what I'm wearing. I need to find a beard to mount and ride STAT.
That was my first party and they were so suprised that this little freshman girl was a FUCKING BEER PONG QUEEN.
thanks for not wanting to stay all night or talk or anything, nice to have a fuck buddy who really doesnt take the buddy part serious
I'm all about the fuck
When the paramedic asked Logan how he fell he explained that he was trying to lick his eyeball, missed and tripped over his own tongue.
Randomize
