It doesn't matter if they shave you or not, you're still susceptible to the staph infection.
So i literally just wrote sorry on my quiz and turned it in.
it's like i can feel the ghost of his dick still inside me
She threw her promise ring on the ground, that's when the freak came out.
He's having sex with his gf again. Every thump of his bed against the wall is insulting to our one night stand.
craigslist free llama. are you in or are you in?
Its important to me that you know there is a tambourine down my pants.
We bonded over the fact that we each, separately, got arrested on the same weekend.
So I walked in on her and she had taped her fingers together and was crying and was whispering something about "how humbling it is being in constant glove mode"
I've drank literally 19 beers and am still good. Utah is worthless
Well if homeless lesbian experimenting divorcée is your new M.O., you're gonna need to start drinking more anyway so if that's what it takes to talk about it tomorrow afternoon, bottoms up bitch
When I die I just want my headstone to my name, date of birth-death, and TEQUILA!!
It gave me the St Patrick's Day nickname Slutty McShitfaced. I've never felt so understood.
I'm worried about how taking care of my mom's dog while being on acid will go.
Hey do you care to explain why there are 3 empty pickle jars next to me when I woke up or do I even wanna know?
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