Duck Duck Cougar?
even if everyone didnt know them screaming eskimo brothers and high fiveing over my head kinda gave it away
I'm drinking whiskey outta the bottle trying to earn the trust of some ducks in the yard
I feel like I had eight dicks in my mouth
I drank entirely too much. My skin hurts to wear
Why yes actually, getting stoned and reading an AARP magazine IS totally where I wanted my night to end!
Drink for every country you've never heard of.
Fuuuuuuuuuck
Question: would Brian be pissed if I brought his 17 year old sister as my date to the wedding?
This is the I'm sorry text for running around yelling don't shit on my rainbow, end up in the fetal position crying at 4 am in my car because someone shit on my rainbow
just pleasured myself to USA hockey beating Russia in the shoot out. god bless America.
I was full on naked standing in his room and I just said "this isn't me" and left.
Well, I woke up on a roll-away, with a knot in the back of my head and penis confetti stuck to me. Also, I apparently literally gave the shirt off my back right before I passed out, so I was topless. Vegas won this trip.
The only thing he told me before he passed out was that he is from Buffalo and I'm a bitch.
There is a guy down by the river wearing a zebra print speedo and a sombrero, with a beer in each hand, screaming "This is America bitches!"
I just licked honey off my own tit. Is there anything about that which doesn't SCREAM single???
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