Instead of a promise ring i got my clit peirced, its a promise that ill always give you ass! =]
Peed on my phone. Dried it out in oven. Technology is both a plus and a minus.
There was a gorilla playing an accordion outside of my last final. I miss college already.
Drinking wine out of an empty soup can and watching spongebob squarepants.. I eveb hate myself
If life deals in absolutes, the in betweens are the most hairy.... Fortune cookie wisdom from a stoned Megan.
Climbing out Mr. Friday night's bathroom window. He thinks I'm puking. Be on state st. with the getaway car and if you could bring me a shirt and some advil that'd be dandy.
So proud. See you in five. I've got coffee.
Highlight of the week: I had sex with a B movie star wearing an eye patch.
Nah, this is the University of Tennessee. She'll get the clap, and get busted for having pot in her dorm by spring break. This time next year she'll be part-timing at a community college as a nursing major. So predictable it hurts.
The date officially concluded on the phrase "Nosh dat vag".
He put on a roller derby documentary. It was either bore myself to death watching that or take off my dress. He was very appreciative.
How early is too early for a booty call on a Monday night?
I told her my hands felt like they touched the sun, never been that stoned before
I want to die, ON THAT, with that INSIDE ME. ironically, I sense that would be the only time I'd feel alive.
So, were you planning on telling me you left your panties in my glovebox??
I'm gunna wear a purple dress, so if you see someone looking confused and lost wearing purple it's probably me
Randomize
