Facebook is asking me which Pokemon I'd be. Is there one whose only moves are gay sex and reading Adrienne Rich?
I would give my right arm to go back to college. Or maybe not. Would be kinda hard to pick up guys with one arm. Then again, knowin what I do now...I could take any freshman bithc with only one arm.
he's totally gay but hes wondering what hes missing out on. Im going to show him.
no pressure.
Coming home soaking wet at three am and trying to convince the front desk man that we came from the library might have worked if I wasn't also roaring at everything.
Homecoming wouldn't be the same without all the drunk old people puking on the street.
I'm trying to spell out I love you with a series of photos of my penis, but I just realized I can't do the Y of you
Stripperoke is exactly what it sounds...
It just hurt to pee because he was fingering for fucking gold in there.
WHO JUST REMOVED THAT SAME BOARD IN TWO MINUTES FLAT WITH NO INJURIES, SHOES, SOCKS, OR BRA?! THIS BITCH. CRACKIN A BEER FOR DA SHOWA. BITCHES AIN'T SHIT MOTHAFUCKA
That is an awkward looking cockshot, not gonna lie
How can I politely yet provocatively ask you for a cock shot?
Nothing like the soothing screaming of your neighbor getting boned while eating a pizza on the front porch.
I just bought a bong from a hot dog stand.
He's like a unicorn and I just wanna domesticate him
There will be bowls smoken and not a single fuck will be given.
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