SECOND walk of shame from the westside Hilton, SECOND foreign family w kids staring at me in my dress, glitter purse, spiky heels and booze breath. I said I was going to church. More confusion.
Tip #47, don't trim the bush when you have the shakes!
So My parents cut me off after I started making blood marys with hienz ketchup
but instead of smelling like hand cream and homemade cookies, she smells like a yeast infection.
You told me alcohol would be the death of you then ordered 10 shots of tequila.
Don't forget your talking to the guy who got arrested for throwing beads back at the Mardi Gras floats. You can't deny that's a first, and neither could that cop.
i just packed a bowl on a big bird place mat and smoked it in a spaceship with a slide. i love babysitting.
Dad just showed up on someone else's golf cart, filled an ice chest with booze and left while yelling "SHINANIGANS!!!!" this is going no where fast.
Chilling. The soap was talking at one point if I rememeber right...
I'm auditing financial statements and ur growing weed this is bullshit how did this happen to me
Sorry you had to clean the sheets with your macro notes
Sangria Flip Cup was probably one of our worse drunken decisions
I felt like a responsible adult. A responsible adult that may or may not end up shitfaced. But not heaving purple puke into a urinal like last time because I'm classy now.
I'm pretty sure ignoring the person that just sent you a picture of their boobs is bad nude etiquette.
I just woke up in his bed.. in a cardboard castle, with a Justin Bieber poster on the ceiling staring down at me, cuddling with 4 empty PBR cans. I win.
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