Soap is not a condiment
I went to moterboat her and I started laughing, so I just kinda blew on them... I think I'm gona call that move the sailboat.
You were playing beer pong by yourself. Finally someone took the ball and threw it into the bonfire. You sat by it, cried, and contemplated how to get it out. For 45 minutes.
you know that saying beer then liquer makes you sicker, it should be beer then pickles makes you throw up alot, everywhere.
Take advantage man but know that every anal bead u drop inside her will make her love u 2% more. It's science
Hey can we break in your window? We need to borrow the dog.
Slow dancing with the chandelier.
its just been over 12 hours, and i`m dying, don`t know how i`m supposed to survive the holidays sexless
Soo I woke up in the storage room at best western....I dont even know what say
Apparently I yelled "Spring Break 1984" at a drunk couple fighting on the side of the road.
Your anal douche was on bathroom counter. Now it's in dumpster. Not ok. I am mad. Very mad.
I wouldn't say I LOVE Pacman. I mean, sure, I'd battle against you in an epic Pacman struggle for blow jobs and glory. But I mean, who wouldn't?
We took a walk on the beach after the bar, he held my hand and kissed me. And then I peed under a lifeguard stand. It was so romantic.
Well as if this year didn't suck enough already, I can now count 2015 as the year I got chlamydia
Let's be honest, college orientation is going to be "here's how to drink everclear"
Randomize
