Yeah, getting the HI-fiVe would really put a damper on my whoring around.
I realized that I've made out with a different boy almost every time we've gone to mcgoreys....I don't need a boyfriend...I have that bar
Make me a promise>>> if you ever see the brats from that tv show NYC Prep walking around, you will trip them, and you wil throw drinks on them
I've spent 9 hours vomitting in the fetal position... how did i stay like this for 9 months?
i made two phi delts show me their dicks in less than 30 words! Take that twitter!
until he told me my vag was like a juicy apple and he loved eating it, yes, i really did think we were both sober.
All I saw was a purple blob and poking out from under was part of a green shirt. Took me a minute to realize it was him under that beast.Thought I should ask if he was actually breathing and conscience but then I saw him slowly exploring what few brave men have done before.
hurry up this bar wont let me order big pitchers of beer for just myself
I spent 10 minutes contemplating condensation on grapes this morning.
im just going to make a prayer circle of top ramen packets and cheap beer
I'm pretty sure your ex of four years just had a baby with some kid and named it after you...
Men are too sensitive. They need to learn to handle me.
No he reached for my hand at the beach. I pretended to be a seagull.
I come into the house and he's fucking doing karaoke by himself... Lady gaga
I need dick so bad, I’m dressing sexy for the school pick up line and sports practices to entice a few of the DILFs
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