I texted her sayin "I gotta brush my teethn then Im omw" maybe hint to do the same
My boss just gave me full permission to come into work wasted this weekend.
Sorry about last night..I didnt realize how drunk you were and when I closed the door it caused you to slam into the mirror...you'll probably piece together the puzzle when you read this and see your hand.
it glows. i had to have it.
she's on the floor slapping my dogs face with slices of pizza
just let her blow you already, it's practically animal cruelty at this point.
Also he wants to know a casual, consise way to ask a girl in a bar if he could eat her out. Think on that.
The last thing I remember was you puking all over the inside of my door and him yelling "PUKING RALLY!!!"
i figure if i show enough tits, no one will notice my eyebrows.
Dammit labor day drinking cancelled due to 3 inch long table saw cut to palm
My team for a project is gonna have weekly meetings at a bar. yessss. they will do all the work while i thor hammer down beers.
Still dying that you shit outside
Ur wingman ability is causing serious doubt
Ok first off its WAY easier if you are actually here
I will most likely miss you the least and fondly remember you as Mr. "I need a minute" but really need 24 hours and 4 extra inches.
Just met my future wife. Please dont fuck her.
Randomize
