i half slept with him but i still dont owe you any money
haha you were like: "I don't want to uh pressure you.." as you took your own shirt off
everyone made a circle around them and startd chanting fight fight. they wernt fighting, they were dry humping
i ate 2 chicken nuggets and puked out 5. that doesn't even make mathematical sense
Now I know how you felt every time you had to listen to me have sex with a girl... mildly disguested yet marginally proud.
Oh nbd. She just had sex with a divorcee. On a charter bus. At 10 a.m. On a Thursday.
If it looks really sketchy and smells like burnt pizza and pot you're in the right place
A little light bondage fun never hurt anybody (erotic asphyxiation excluded). Car batteries attached to reproductive organs have.
Being the only woman in a triathlon group - it's a penis paradise.
Dude walks in wearing jean shorts and a graphic tshirt and goes home with an attractive female. EXPLAIN YOURSELF UNIVERSE.
He managed to crash an entire train of shopping carts into a wall. I think he noticed my implants.
well what the fuck is the POINT of teetotal mardi gras
I'm out of prison. Wanna start a band?
after what u told me last night I think we're past the wtf zone and at this point u should just join me in wondering if my barista lover is a gay porn star
She called me at 2am crying because her late night booty call moved out of state
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