Do you still have your period?
i hope my daughter doesn't end up with cankles. no guy likes cankles.
I'm not going to need your "it doesn't mean you're a slut" pep talk after all.
Drunk me thinks I can light up a cig anywhere, sober me finds this hilarious and highly irresponsible. The grocery store is not a bar.
The bartender asked if I wanted a to-go cup for my crown and coke.....I just realized I'm back in Montana and fuck did I miss home.
Fuck going to see The Hunger Games tonight. The only thing I'm hungry for is some dick. Let's go to the bar.
I remember seeing his penis I just dont know exactly what I did with it
I fail to see the problem of enjoying a glass of wine while I poop...
the point I'm tryimg to make is that you didn't need to take the whole box in with you
He may not be fully over his current wife yet. But wait until I show him my tits in his office at the end of the day tonight.
It's like wanting to be a vampire vs being a vampire. You don't know the cock lust until it's infected you.
She wanted me to stick my dick in the birthday cake she got me
Trying to figure out why my back is hurting. And then I remember I got fucked up against a tree last night
No, I barely made it home last nite. Kept telling cab driver I live across the street from Susan Sarandon?? Thank god her coop addy is posted online.
I just masturbated at work... Don't know why but I thought you should know
Drank vodka clubs for 6 hours last night. Holy shit just realized that.
Randomize
