just checked my call log and realized that we talked for 3 mns. what did i say for that long?
pretty standard. you have fun last night?
apparently....what exactly does 'pretty standard' mean?
typical hot then cold, followed by a death threat.
sorry about last night, I don't know what happened but I woke up this morning and looked strikingly similar to courtney love, it had to be bad.
Today in class was pretty awsome. I dont feel like i have to throw up and im actually paying attention. This is a first for friday
My lack of memory is directly related to being friends with you.
The bartender just started bringing me gin and tonic in a pint glass to save himself trips...
I feel like wearing underwear would just be poor planning
Somewhere along the night we ended up at a food lion giving jello shots to high school girls.
the whole story woulnd't be so depressing if i had made out with ANYONE but the piano player.
Alright. I will breast feed the first person to get here.
idk. I was on the deck with Dominic and i felt something weird on my arm. I looked down and you were licking my elbow.
You got her pregnant one week before your vasectomy? You couldn't wait one week to cheat on me?
Welp just ran into my high school history teacher while buying a pregnancy test...there goes my veil of innocence in this town.
I am now picking what guy I will hang out with based on how many Pokémon they live near.
I butt dialed her mom while cheating on her. Needless to say Christmas will be awkward.
I've decided if you aren't here in fifteen minutes I'm leaving you for Mario the 75 year old Colombian bartender.
Randomize
