No awkward lesbian experiences without me
Currently listening to 'Just Put it in Your Mouth.' remember when i went through that phase?
You should swallow it and be like the ticking crocodile. Only you play Still of the Night.
The walk of shame is far, far worse on crutches.
A chick at the bar last night took my black berry, looked at my Brick Breaker score and told me she couldnt take someone that has a lower score than her seriously.
In case you were wondering...putting everclear into a humidifier DOES get you really really drunk.
It was like good, clean fun, but with bodyshots.
You dont realize corn stalks will cut until you run from the cops through a corn field.
just saw someone climb out of the dumpster at cvs and start walking down the street like it was completely normal
You know what would make this walk of shame even better? Picking up my cap n gown on the way to my car
The paramedics said she just kept whispering "I just wanted to party"
Woke up this morning with Nerf Bullets stuck to everything in my house and nut in my belly button. What exactly happened last night?
He got hotter. I'm offended on behalf of the rest of our graduating year.
Btw you guys passed out eating DP dough and watching Pocahontas... on a monday
it was stoner heaven..
I guess I’m only into threesomes at Halloween, because I just woke up next to “Marilyn Monroe” and “Joe DiMaggio” in their condo
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