dude, you're being a jerk.
sorry, didn't mean to pull a Cheney
Denmark girl wants me to go out but i remembered shes a raging whore with extremely questionable morals. Not feelin that tonight
it was all downhill after the free blackjack taco
well this feels familiar. awake at the crack of dawn laying in the fetal position praying for the sweet release of death. i think im done with jager for a while
unrelatedly i think im gonna download boogie nights just to see mark wahlberg's penis
Heading to the gym, the one that guy said he goes to. Already checked online, his class is at 5. And no, this isn't too much after meeting him last night. Stop judging me,
In Berlin they just cured HIV with stem cells. I am hereby fucking anything that moves.
I just very easily got pretty high off of one bowl of shitty dirt weed. I'm a sad excuse for who I used to be.
A talk about Arizona woman's rights politics has never turned to sex so quickly before.
how many people can say they bit their tattoo off?
Literally sitting on my bed in the dark trying not to throw up
I feel like dick that good should always be within a five kilometre radius of me.
Let's drink tonight I promise I'll make it out of the house
Am I under any obligation to let my new fuck buddy know I slept with his little sister?
IT WAS JUST SO LITTLE AND AWKWARDLY FLOPPING BACK AND FORTH
Randomize
