Banjos are just sex machines. Like lights to moths, banjos are to hipster bitches.
We JUST got rid of the new years fatties at my gym and now the spring break fatties are here. goddamn.
I don't know but the stairs are covered in apples
YOU COME FROM SAD WHALE FAMILY, DEEP IN OCEAN!
Ya I know. She's self aware though, like the terminator. Which is the best kind of crazy
Everyone loves nachos, first of all. Second, Ke$ha is entirely appropriate for the age grou too young to realize she probably has Hep C.
well, at the moment I'm sleeping in someone's closet in a buzzlightyear snuggie, so I can't judge,
Dude respond to my evite. You're either coming to the orgy or not.
Who says no to sex and donuts?!
He's gonna be like you slept with too many of my friends and you're being voted off the island haha
I AM NOT LOSING TO SOME FICTIONAL CROSSDRESSER
Note to self: never fuck a Canadian, surprisingly highly disappointing
I woke up this morning to find myself laying in a beer puddle with "I'm sorry" written on the shaft of my dick and Nicole was nowhere to be found. Gotta love her
..needless to say, i got fired. But I'm in the parking lot tanning on top of your car... so its not all bad.
So I slept with some guy last night and when I woke up in the am couldnt remember his name. I text him n asked "How do you spell your name?" to try n find out and all he replied was "With an A." WTF!?
Randomize
