I only kidnapped one of them. chill
i'm officially boycotting relationships. hello random hook ups and treating men like meat.
you have to be so drunk to ignore a taser
I just sneezed alcohol in a candle and started a fire.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Do you know how hard it is to write about pediatric crohn's when we're trying to figure out the keg situation for graduation?
My brother just asked if I would keep having one nighters with that guy because he really likes the organic cotton v-necks he leaves behind.
You just kept shouting "I AM AN ADULT!" until he agreed to carry you home on his shoulders.
I do have a life. It just consists of making scarves and chesse straws now
I'm going to crush up my last 7 Percocets into a fine powder and toss my popcorn in it.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Cool. Some 22 year old kids gave me a ride home from the bar last night. In related news, I made out with a 22yr old last night. He was adorable
I don't know if your celebrity crush has ever asked you for nudes, but it's fucking awesome
It's not even 8 pm, or Saint Patrick's Day, and Kevin is drunk on my roof humping the air
Yeah, great now I will be tampon girl
Update: pile o Coke party starting at approx 4 - 7 and going until 1ish to celebrate our founding fathers and love of cocaine and hatred of everyone\n
He has a wall filled with panties from past hook ups. So no, I didn't fuck him.
Randomize