oh and i feel obligated to inform you that there will be no sexin' because it's 'lady time' for me. so this ain't a booty call.
Is it bad that everytime I read or hear "Woo Hoo" I immediately think of sex because of The Sims?
There's a girl in here wearing a kaballah bracelet and a miley Cyrus tshirt. consider her judged.
I wish scraping a resin bowl could be considered cleaning.
I give him blow jobs while he watches sports.. how am I not his gf yet??
I just found out I was conceived in a rehab facility... that's better than finding out your dad could be someone else right?
Don't worry, nothing happened....but we should have a fire extinguisher here.
She was shaking her boobs and I was so high all I could think was "breast maracas"
Dont tell her I prefer to have an aura of mystique surronding me and my penis.
It's like the bermuda triangle of cat puke
Just got caught staring at a woman breast feeding. My only response was, "She's so adorable".
We didn't want to make a pit stop so I just helped my husband pee in a bottle. No one told me this was part of love.
It was an "I snuck in through the window at 5am with my underwear in my pocket" kind of night.
i mean ive seen your left buttcheek how much more bro can this get
Okay. Did I say I did anything unusual? Because I usually do weird stuff. Did I clean mirrors? My mirrors are really clean, and I think I remember having windex..
Randomize
