Goodbye hot boy in my geo class...goodbye my lover, goodbye my friend. you have been the one, you have been the reason I came to claassss
All I remember about walking back home was that I maced my shadow.
He's been grabbing my ass as a greeting since 2004, sex was overdue
Judging by her face, I'd say she's at least dabbled with meth...
you know, even black out drunk I can always remember the exact point where I should have stopped drinking.
just used clorox wipes to give myself a whores bath. hello finals week
were drug buddies, doing lines off her ass is just a bonus
Woke up and there was a kayak in the pool. Are you alive?
He professed his love for me while I danced on a picnic table with a bottle of Absolut. I said thank you and walked away.
New drunken fun fact of last night, after I pushed Sarah and before I started making out with guy #1, I shouted that I'd go to third base on a first date, then threw myself at him
I just threw in a dip with a guy that superglued his fake tooth back in today. My life is complete.
Got a minor my first day of college from the bike police. I'm gonna like it here
You are the only lesbian I know that needs plan b
I think he thought I was too drunk to handle his parrot
Are you playing pokemon in the dark and sexting? I can't be mad at that.
Randomize
