she quoted hannah montana in her facebook status. i will never be speaking to her in person again.
mimosa in my stainless steel water bottle. going green is not that bad.
It feels like Jesse James cheated on America.
Ive been using palmolive to shower with for he last week, dont tell me about not having money. Im heading to the bar r u going.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
At this point I just want to meet a man with a job.
nah, they dropped the charges. apparently ripping his junk when he tried to hop the fence seemed like punishment enough...
You would be too ashamed to ever love me again if you saw the filth I just created. It brings unspeakable dishonor to the nacho dynasty. Like I raped the king's daughter, cut off her hands and made him eat them that's how hard I fucked up nachos.
Steve called. He needs me to pick him up. He also asked for a set of his clothes, he can't find them. He is such a strong motivation to stay sober.
It's a goat... but where the fuck did it come from?
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
How bad would it be if I wore out the dress we got peed on in. You're the only one who knows.
Crying on the toilet and taking a shit. This is what being an adult is about
I'm pretty sure I lit a prostitute's cigarette while sharing a pizza with a homeless guy last night
He skipped an important family function with his dying father to fuck me. Terrible human, amazing fuck buddy.
I'm sitting naked on my bathroom floor and it remind me of us.
That's my way of saying I miss you
How so I keep attracting the virgins? HOW?
You talk about your love for your ninja turtle onesie when you're drunk. Are you really surprised?
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