Wish i knew that 10 minutes ago when i told him to dance with my blackberry while i got another drink
Do you ever close your eyes when your having sex with your girlfriend and pretend she didn't get fat after high school?
Ya after that i took a dump on a car... We're definitely partying with him again
I saw your arrest video on youtube. you look so thin!
if that's jizz on my steering wheel i'm gonna be pissed...and impressed.
Just sit in your kitchen floor until something speaks to you.
just had to make the 420 edibles gluten free and kosher for passover.
My dream had 1 penis and 2 pizzas in it. Priorities?
The topic of sex in the jamba banana suit has come up on multiple occasions. We're just waiting for a moment to try it out.
I just got hit on at the bar by a guy who used his mother as a wingman, she was pretty convincing. Only in Stratford.
I'm currently sitting at your kitchen table eating chicken nuggets that I dug out of the trash and thinking about how much I need to get laid.
YOUR VAGINA IS SO CUTE IT'S LIKE A LITTLE MACAROON
Sometimes having a penis is like having a really stupid drunk best friend. You see it doing dumb shit but you're just not the one in charge.
He fucked me while wearing a unicorn horn. I think I have found the one...
it was the kind of sex that I don't even know how my hair extentions are still in
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