It really wasent that hard. The male one had a M and the woman one had a W. I just couldent comprehend that at the time.
its like they have never seen someone walk through campus with a plunger
tonight, alcohol would be proud of us
My cardio has turned into running out of the cold from bar to bar.
girls just need to accept the fact that i'm going to make out with their boyfriends
There are GROWN MEN with fake HP wands flinging curses at me in Walmart.
That's funny. Are they weird looking???
OF COURSE THEY ARE WEIRD LOOKING, THEY ARE STALKING ME IN WALMART. WITH. FAKE. WANDS.
would it be subtle enough if I played birthday sex on repeat while I may or may not be stripping?
My judgement was not "clouded". My judgement was in the midst of a fucking hurricane or something ridiculous.
Solid teamwork gives us a good shout of both bringing home trophy cougs
Just got your message from Saturday. Shove all the kittens down your pants? Really?
I was emotionally compromised.
He kept telling me Te Amo last night. Over and over. And that he was scared. Drunkenly. In Spanish.
The real estate's complaint had the words "loud squealing at 2am" in it. Then I remembered that was me spoon feeding you guys old potato salad while you screeched like baby birds. Great night.
I just wanted to be the best at what I did even if that included sexing a whole fraternity or sorority ya know?
So much Jack, so little girl.
I don't get it. If he broke into Taco Bell at 2 am, then why couldn't he have brought me home a fucking taco???
Randomize
