made out with the bouncer to distract him from how illegitimate my fake id is.
all you kept saying from the spare room was "can you bring me a puke bowl...and the cat"
I don't know how but I have our hotel room door handle in my purse... this can not be good
As it turns out, drunk trust falling that guy at the top of the waterslide didn't really work out for anyone..
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Can you explain to me how i got kicked out of a bar last night, from outside the bar?
And then as he was trying to conceal his boner from everybody, you said aloud "just grab your cock and get out of the pool"
Repeat. Dildo on the ceiling, confiscated potato shooter, and bottle of yegger. Repeat. Ceiling dildo and yegger.
He turned me into a screamer. Guess I'm really not a lesbian.
Well i think matt shit his pants so ill mark that as a W
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I don't want a mention or even a whisper of a Shakespeare Festival by that or any other name including, but not limited to, a fucking Renaissance Fair. Are we clear? It will be a DEALBREAKER .
When she asked why I felt bad I said that it may have had something to do with the gin and cold pizza I had for breakfast.... And then I reflected on what my life has become.
His dick is so big it could be an arm rest.
All I know is I got on a table at late night and sang gotta go my own way
Sorry, I didn't know he was with you. The ongoing collapse of Trump has me horny as hell.
Never go to your parents' super bowl party. I learned, in great detail, "Why Aunt Trisha is a hoe" Not enough beer on the eastern seaboard.
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