I'm too scared of my Fleshlight to even use it anyway.
Tried to buy Xanax from my boss last night. Wrong Mike.
she gave me one of her senior pics and told me specifically to give it to you. In other words she still wants to suck your dick.
Walk of shame... his parents made me go to church with them first. in my club top sweat pants and slippers. i just slapped god in the face
shouldve known this week was gonna be bad when I threw up in my coffee mug
We did however see an 87 year old guy die and get resuscitated last night at the bar. He then finished his beer and his game of pool.
Miller High Life will be the death of me. Well, that and shower sex.
Just a heads up before you get home. Took the shelves out of the fridge so i could fit the beer ball and bucket of riot punch. Apparently i decided the stove was the best place to keep them. They got cooked when we pre heated to cook a bird we shot. This may be the final straw for our security deposit
He simply fell in the fire, rolled out and continued to finish his bottle of vodka. Everyone else instantly sobered up just watching it.
He tried to do the do on me last night and my exact words were "stay away from my princess parts. they're renovating."
she fell asleep in a torn bush after playing cards at a nursing home.
Is kiddo a correct name to call someone who you stuck your dick in?
Pretty sure I got pink eye from the strip club. There is also still beer cans rattling around in my shower.
Hi. I have frying pans taped to my feet. I achave to go the hospital, theyre on pretty tight. Can't feel legs bring me juice
So I love answering sex questions in intimate relationships class on a clicker when im sitting next to my cousin..
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