I hope my margaritas pass through security.
Yes perhaps we are both wrong. And did you call me bj girl?
he asked me for a gerbil feeder full of alcohol
making out was so insane. it felt like our tongues were paintbrushes made of waves and we were painting an ocean galazy
What are you talking about?! I shot gunned a monster while simaltaneously blowing gym boy Todd. If I'm not the poster child for being well rounded and versatile I have no idea what NYU is looking for
Did you pour a hundred fucking pounds of sand in my car last night?
lol... you weighed it?
Peeing off the roof of a motel lighting a cigar with matches and speaking fluent spanish with a chilen exchange student...how do iget into these situations?
And I'd make him talk dirty to me. In Forrest Gump's voice.
Do you deliver to the black dark pit where I am? I think it's called.... The toilet? Right next to hell...
Definitely had a dick in my ass while watching the Seahawks win. Best NFC Championship game ever.
If there is a heaven, that's what it will be. Bagel Bites and cunnilingus.
Just please try not to piss Danny off, I really can't afford to find a new drug dealer again
I'll like his pictures on Instagram every once and a while so that when he sees my name he is reminded of the best blow job he's ever gotten.
He's being awfully beer snobby for a guy who ordered salad
I did wake up to a random meat and cheese plate next to my bed, that was a thrill.
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