I have glitter on my penis. Do you know anything about this?
hanging on that rope, lady gaga looks exactly like a used tampon
all i know is that if they can hide that much blood in her outfit, they definitely could have hid a penis
Let's go to weight watchers and eat in front of them.
This guy behind me is answering all of her questions. I may give him a lapdance to take my next test for me
Do you ever just KNOW it's gonna be a good day? I mean, like in a "just found a Vicodin in the bottom of your purse" kinda way?
Would you like me to write a persuasive essay on how you should let me suck your dick?
I went to a bar in my pajamas last night. I'll be there again tonight in a wolf costume.
Is a wave an appropriate goodbye when your one night stand wakes up and walks out towards the door while you are looking through the garbage for the evidence of a condom?
Do you think I threw out my left shoulder during the keg stand or the stripper pole? It's medically relevant my chiropractor wants to know.
The crooked penis I maybe could have looked past...but no foreplay? Deal breaker.
For a guy who won't fuck me, your dick is out a lot when we talk.
Validation I posted a good pic? The lonely fuckboys send out the booty call signal. Of course I answered the call; Gotham needs its hero.
He puked all over the side of the car and the head rest behind him...and then all he said was "America."
i think i just naturally attract stoners
I brought my porn computer to class by accident
How much porn do you watch if you need a special computer?
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