He looked like the mexican version of Steve Carrell with a unibrow.
thank god random hookups don't end with college. happy birthday, america.
He asked about stds. I told him I don't have any... which I don't. They are now called sti's. Whooopsie
so my doctor just swabbed my throat, and he looked up in suprise when i had no gag reflex. yea, he just judged me.
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then we talked for a little and he asked my last name which since I have yet to get a fb request I'm 95% sure its for a restraining order
you kept shouting how the only tree you would hump is an elm tree because they're under populated
How did I end up in the pool?!
Welcome to ASU
Drunk me cleaned my room for me. Needless to say our relationship has improved greatly
I woke up to him pissing in their fireplace with fairy wings on.
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Did you find any other hidden treasures in my room? Specifically weed? Or Slim Jims?
The guy behind me is talking about how his life goal is to use his knowledge of mathematics to make the world a better place. My only life goal right now is getting through this lecture without throwing up in my lap.
I tried to smoke out of half a banana, and lit my nose hair on fire. So I feel like that sums up my life pretty well.
I did get to watch you pee, tho. That counts as another precious moment.
My dad found my bra hanging from my rear view mirror. Happy long weekend.
Lol, yeah it'll be fun,but will it be cereal and dick pics fun?
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