Loo but I'm already drunk TINIGHT! CAPS ATTACK
your ex dropped by. you can call me dwight howard, cuz im the king of rebounds
Your clothes are in washers 2,3 and 4. I arranged by darks, whites, then frat... I'm not even joking
I'm glad the dog doesn't judge me for doing leftover lines and watching George of the Jungle at 10 am
You can come over, sure. But I'll be watching college hockey during the blow job.
Do you think if you have sex with a girl twin, her twin brother feels it to? Woke up at her house and they both have a look of disappointment on their faces.
I feel like all of the victims from Seven. Best birthday weekend ever.
Rosemary is literally sitting on the ground holding on to the rug because she thinks she is going to fall if she lets go. We smoked way too much.
This is actually a pretty big deal for him. I mean, he contacted a stranger out of concern for someone else instead of for sex.
That does show growth.
90 seconds of pumping and 2 months of bragging all summer. So much for my reputation here.
Pagan metal show. There is a folk dance happening in the mosh pit. Also, I have no idea where we are.
Are you sure he's still you're boyfriend when you're sober?
I mentioned the porn thing he mentioned a brother it all kinda just came together
OK, but next time I'd like to be present for our make-up sex.
I don't know what kind of bucket list you have, but having sex with a tree isn't on mine...
Randomize
