walkin home..,.jsut saw the cheshire cat
watch out for the queen of hearts
fuucck i forgot ab her
I ate one of your animal crackers. just one. ok four. but no frosting. ok frosting.
I found a knife in my bed when I got back this morning. I think one of my roommates has it in for me
Do you remember that blonde girl he brought home from the bar on Friday night? She didn't leave until Monday afternoon. We didn't even know she was still in his room...what a sketchy weekend.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I dont think he stole the pillow. I mean if he wanted a souvenir, my thong was on the nightstand.
the bar tender told me i could keep an air matress in the backroom.
Ohmy god im about to fuxk my TA. i thyought this was a dream but i love you. <3
I smell like booze and the valet literally buckled me in, def top 3 walks of shame
Yeah when I texted her last night the only response I got was "stoned eating cobbler."
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Just gave my thesis presentation, pretty sure I made out with the admissions woman last night.
i'm not drunk or reckless enough to have you track my every fucking move. I AM AN ADULT
Let's play another riveting game of "Whose boxers are hanging on my fence?"
is it just me or does "lol" kill any sort of vibe while sexting?
don't do laundry while your drunk! i found a ketchup bottle & clothes hanger in the washer this morning!
Who the fuck just called me and played funkytown
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