i just walked into a room at this party and someone yelled "dibs!"...
it doesn't count as moral degradation if you win the strip off -right?
Just got laid for the first time in 3 yrs, 10 mo, 1 wk & 2 days. YESSSS.
Just saw someone buying TWO six packs of O'Doul's. WHY ??
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
She told me at midnight she would blow me harder than a new years party kazoo
he was sobbing,drinking his beer, all while confessing his love for her. awkward was an understatement...
Literally just spent 45 minutes converting my paintball gun to shoot condoms....
Today I learned you can't titshake with a corset on.
They only knew me as the lesbian that passed out in a bathtub. That's not what you call friendship.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
TAing a class of 300 froshies and being so hungover I forgot a bra is my way of making dreams come true.
I want to name my colorful bowl Batman. Why? I still have yet to figure it out. But I'm calling it Batman.
Sorry about the picture of wills balls via snapchat last night btw
Of course I'll be there. I never miss an opportunity to smell like cigarettes, cheap beer, and shame.
I sent him a cookie cake that said "Congratulations you're not a father"
I got sriracha sauce on my mask while I was eating fast food, now wearing it makes me hungry
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