Texts From Last Night

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  (570): View more from Pennsylvania

  She said I was really immature but whatever...oh by the way we just bought a toilet and turned it into a beer bong so come over

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  (570): She said I was really immature but whatever...oh by the way we just bought a toilet and turned it into a beer bong so come over http://tfl.nu/astk
  Replies (8) Good night (2381) Bad night (691)
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  (843): View more from South Carolina

  he believed the zit on my nose was a piercing...until he tried to bite it. needless to say he didnt ask for my number

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  (843): he believed the zit on my nose was a piercing...until he tried to bite it. needless to say he didnt ask for my number http://tfl.nu/katp
  Replies (20) Good night (674) Bad night (6888)
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  (706): View more from Georgia

  I just realized that all of my cardio comes from dancing on tables.

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  (706): I just realized that all of my cardio comes from dancing on tables. http://tfl.nu/8ikv
  Replies (25) Good night (5233) Bad night (729)
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  (707): View more from California

  left comments onEVRY SINGLE1of my posts n status updates.Im done dating freshmen

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  (707): left comments onEVRY SINGLE1of my posts n status updates.Im done dating freshmen http://tfl.nu/p86b
  Replies (13) Good night (683) Bad night (4815)
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  (517): View more from Michigan

  I took my vicodin with tequila. I can FEEL gravity...

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  (517): I took my vicodin with tequila. I can FEEL gravity... http://tfl.nu/ueq6
  Replies (34) Good night (7011) Bad night (1543)
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  (352): View more from Florida

  Mass Text: Free blowjob to first person to bring me a nacho cheese chalupa.

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  (352): Mass Text: Free blowjob to first person to bring me a nacho cheese chalupa. http://tfl.nu/e1sr
  Replies (26) Good night (6893) Bad night (1624)
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  (206): View more from Washington

  I had a dream about a turtle sitting on top of a horse skull. I'm certain its a symbol for my dead sex life. Trust me.

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  (206): I had a dream about a turtle sitting on top of a horse skull. I'm certain its a symbol for my dead sex life. Trust me. http://tfl.nu/t4ey
  Replies (3) Good night (1169) Bad night (3120)
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  (413): View more from Massachusetts

  It got to the point that I had to make flashcards with their name on the front and dick pics on the back.

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  (413): It got to the point that I had to make flashcards with their name on the front and dick pics on the back. http://tfl.nu/936t
  Replies (14) Good night (1404) Bad night (2504)
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  (819): View more from Quebec

  I fell asleep with all the lights and heat on in the apartment with windows open, Earth Hour is lost on people like me.

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  (819): I fell asleep with all the lights and heat on in the apartment with windows open, Earth Hour is lost on people like me. http://tfl.nu/9k8k
  Replies (4) Good night (1301) Bad night (2360)
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  (281): View more from Texas

  She said her hobbies include bangin guys on one night stands and then sending them facebook relationship requests the next morning just to freak em out

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  (281): She said her hobbies include bangin guys on one night stands and then sending them facebook relationship requests the next morning just to freak em out http://tfl.nu/guh4
  Replies (33) Good night (11443) Bad night (1371)
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  (402): View more from Nebraska

  when i went to the store to buy my pregnancy test they were giving carnations to all the moms and they gave me one and said "just in case"

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  (402): when i went to the store to buy my pregnancy test they were giving carnations to all the moms and they gave me one and said "just in case" http://tfl.nu/zxvf
  Replies (15) Good night (4669) Bad night (4142)
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  (303): View more from Colorado

  Party at my house. Beach themed. Clothing optional.

  (970): View more from Colorado

  Wouldn't that make it "Nude Beach Themed?"

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  (303): Party at my house. Beach themed. Clothing optional. (970): Wouldn't that make it "Nude Beach Themed?" http://tfl.nu/doci
  Replies (8) Good night (3590) Bad night (943)
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  (618): View more from Illinois

  I rolled out of the car, crawled on all fours to the door, did somersaults all the way to my room, and then I ran across the parking lot to tell our neighbor you wanted to bang him. I'm not even sure if it was the right guy.

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  (618): I rolled out of the car, crawled on all fours to the door, did somersaults all the way to my room, and then I ran across the parking lot to tell our neighbor you wanted to bang him. I'm not even sure if it was the right guy. http://tfl.nu/it0x
  Replies (6) Good night (2568) Bad night (759)
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  (636): View more from Missouri

  Im pretty sure at one point a very high you yelled, with actual tears in your eyes, "im not wrestling with you anymore, you dont respect my safe word!!"

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  (636): Im pretty sure at one point a very high you yelled, with actual tears in your eyes, "im not wrestling with you anymore, you dont respect my safe word!!" http://tfl.nu/8gr1
  Replies (9) Good night (2029) Bad night (1047)
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  (248): View more from Michigan

  I wanna just rip ass and see his reaction but i bet itd be better to shatter that illusion when hes drunk

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  (248): I wanna just rip ass and see his reaction but i bet itd be better to shatter that illusion when hes drunk http://tfl.nu/6hfb
  Replies (1) Good night (580) Bad night (373)

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