Come get meeee. I'm stranded in the middle of no where with Paul (?). I think u puked on his friend.
FIrst one done
How did it go?
I dunno I taled about women being treated wrong and quoted Ice T. So probably a "c"
Dude, I think my check liver light just came on
oh my god. i just found my camera... on top of the bush outside of my house. never let me drink everclear again
We had a complete conversation while I was giving him head, at one point he even stopped me and said 'I love how we're just hanging out.'
When you get home we need to compare our schedules and set up masturbation slots. I'm scares of you walking in on me. Again.
This girl can open a bottle without using her hands and she's 21. She meets my standards
You tried to luge a beer down a flip flop.
I was crying hysterically and you wouldn't stop petting my ear and shushing me every time I tried to say something.
She just face-timed her mom and had her watch all of us toast to her grandmas tits..
Oh my fucking god I saw the pictures. What the mother fucking fuck. Destroy the pictures. Destroy the fucking pictures.
Please confirm the destruction of the pictures. NOW.
The bachelorette party was all fun and games until the strippers came. AKA you guys.
I apologize for chief "dances with dolphins" sucking on your friends foot
Turning 21 will be slightly bittersweet. Never again will I be able to get underage drunk at Disney World, now I'll only be able to get legal drunk and that just sets a whole different and sad tone for my life.
My vibrator looks like a lipstick tube. So does my mace. I just realized the potential problems of keeping them both in the same bag.
Awwww breaks my heart, I just wanna fix his teeth and give him a blowjob.