fine then we can just have courtesy sex i definetly won't like it
I enjoy that i have a whole shelf of clothes that I've accumulated from random sex. You know the ones you get to make the morning after look less awkward like similar to an athletes trophy shelf
It's like having an annoying little brother who wants to have sex with you
I just found 22 drunken videos and 4 naked pictures on my phone. We'll start the bidding at $5
I found a knife in my bed when I got back this morning. I think one of my roommates has it in for me
I thought I would take a shower to wake me up but now I'm naked wet and stoned laying on my bed instead of just stoned laying on my bed
I dont know. Theres no way you can be ready for the sex hurricane that will consume you.
There are twenty thousand men on this campus, please have sex with someone who isn't my drug dealer
Everyone was trying to get you to do a keg stand but you refused & instead declared you could do it yourself, crouched on the keg in your 6 inch heels, leaned over, and gave yourself one.
Tackling and headbutting friends, running away and hiding from everyone, attempting to streak across campus, and then waking up with no sign of a hangover... happy 21 to me
The highlight of the trip was definitely my dad telling me that I "used to be his prettiest daughter."
Fuck my life he IS a stripper, Ive been sleeping with a stripper named Phoenix. damnit, I knew the sex was too good
We were driving past a farm when he screamed at me to stop the car, then he jumped out and tried to ride a cow.
you fell asleep with her panties on your face. how are you surprised??
Let's get this straight. I am six fucking feet tall. Do you even understand how limited my options in guys to date are? No. Did you see my last three boyfriends? I looked like a fucking giant next to them. So I will fuck this six-foot-seven Italian model even if I am the ugliest girl at this party because, goddammit, I deserve to.
Randomize
