I like how you formally end text interactions, just turn your phone off or don't respond you pervert
you kept naming everything at the party...like "boy i'm going to make out with" and "table i'm going to dance on later"
He kept screaming "it's so seductive" while he was humping the wall
Whatever. It was high school. Back then I'd blow anyone who had enough room between their chest and their steering wheel for my head to fit.
dude wearing that thong all day was not worth the 7 bucks
I'm also 3/4 on the frats. Its like my goal of traveling to all 7 continents, but different somehow and a lot less morally sound.
On the oral sex Super Bowl board I drew 7 and 1. If I get lucky, someone will be swallowing during Madonna's half time. I'm sure she'd approve.
Saturday evening, however, will be my vodka and bubble wrap extravaganza.
He told me he doesn't want to fuck anymore because he needs to focus on school. Either he grew a vagina or he's secretly gay, it has to be one of the two.
I have no idea what that means but I'm googling things just so I can watch my thumbs move
When you say shenanigans does that mean I should bring birth control?
I need to go back to work. I've had so much sex since the shutdown started. last night we tried and a little flag came out saying "nothing is left in here try a week later"
Come here I'm naked
And I want mozzarella sticks
It's not stalking if you do it on LinkedIn...
There's a rash on my genitals that would like a word with you.
Randomize
