i wonder what megan fox's vagina feels like.
Heaven soaked bacon.
I felt like a fire hydrant the vomit just kept coming out
He looked me straight in the eye when he was fingering me last night...it was very serial killer.
that was probably me. ive bitten a lot of people.
Fourth time I had to be woken up in the line of Whataburger in two weeks. First time my shirt was free of vomit.
Next test. Underwater blowjob. If you fail...out of water blow job
I figure hes like disneyworld. You know youre only going once or twice in life. Might as well have fun and ride the rides
This is amazing. I can pinpoint the window in time that you lost all sanity.
Btw, do you want me to fix this with a box of wine and a chick flick or is this more of a 'lets head to the strip club' problem? I'm just trying to analyze the emotional depth of the situation.
Being with her was like shitty sexual fear factor big ass sausage nipples over sized outty belly button i was scared and drunk tell know one
Don't patronize me, I thought of that on peyote, so it was basically like a message from God.
well apparently i was just calling everyone cunts. then i awoke from my blackout to 3 very mad roommates who didn't bring a key out with them
My mom just told me not to dance on any tables on Halloween...I'm choosing to take that statement as a joke
it's like that time i was drunk at relay for life. but with balloon animals...
And I hope you're not misinterpreting us fucking as me trying to win you back. The sex is good and girls have needs.
Randomize
