put your party hat on. and by party hat I mean no panties
He said i was a degenerate twofaced catholic slut and a grade a bitch. Quite complimentary really. i guess i shouldn't insult the red wings
Nothing like a false "my-dad-found-my-weed" alarm on Christmas day.
Itd be nice if there was a level of interest in me somewhere in between the indifference and obsession that I've only been attracting
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Well after we were arrested you just kept chanting "Like a good neighbor state farm is there"
my entire left arm went numb
you need to get that checked to make sure you're not wired to have strokes instead of orgasms
Pretty sure my boner drove me home. Like it didn't just do the steering it was the gas and brake too..
How's my sex life is me mastubating next to her dog. that's how it's going.
Just responding to the most professional request I've ever gotten to get shitfaced.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Do you ever look at someone's Snapchat story and think ‘you told me you would eat my ass’?
She was drunk, dancing on the table. Until the table leg completely broke off and she fell on the ground and broke her front tooth straight off. Worse news is there making her pay for the table
I just remembered something. We made out last night, people cheered.
We never leave a bad bitch behind. its a party foul..we'll find you somehow
You kept singing "your gonna lose that girl" to him right in front of her.. of course you got punched in the face.
We live walking distance from the coors factory. no, we do not have a dry week.
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