puking up blue gatorade is not as nearly as much fun as it sounds
he's got a countert top full of yard sale blenders so id say maragita wednesdays is a go.
Yes, do intervene. Unless it involves cowboys with loud trucks and hard 9 inch dicks. Then just come back for me in the morning.
i thought i'd fucked her to death. no lie. she just stopped moving.
Just found a ramen cup in the stall and all of the showers running with no one in them. WHERE ARE YOU?
my drunken justification for peeing in her closet was that her shoes were ugly
Last comment. I know of no exercises, diets or practices out there to help keeping balls young and healthy. They simply succumb to gravity.
Well when you get back to your computer, there's a nice explanation of pansexuality on your Skype.
Being the only woman in a triathlon group - it's a penis paradise.
I have so many plans for this weekend and sobriety is not invited.
Make me food? I don't want to be a science experiment. I'm dunk. Holy shit. Drunk*. Let's do science.
Come over so I can fuck you louder than her country music
Buying drug test kits off amazon. And qualifying for amazonSmile donation to a kids hospital feels wrong and funny at the same time xD
I'm covered in jizz and the toll booth lady knew it
I’m 37 with a career and a home and yesterday my niece set up Snapchat so I can sext with my 22 year old boyfriend/fuck buddy. Yes. Yes I’d say I need help?
Randomize
