Apparently at one point I was wearing my sweatshirt backwards like it was normal and then I threw up into the hood. Never drinking again.
the crunchwrap supreme is the def leppard of the taco bell menu
which is why it's clearly superior
we can't become the bulimic house in the complex dude. Besides, you need teeth for your career.
I just smoked my last bit of kief with a grill lighter. This is what crackheads must feel like.
Woke up to pictures of me cooking wings with a blow torch.
Uhg.. This isn't fair. I just want to have sex with you until i lose consciousness, wake up and start over... is that so much to ask?
It's been a wonderful constant drunkeness. We played Marco polo with some random like 8 yr olds in the kiddie pool.
Who was the person who brought the rooster when they won @ beer pong
I was able to hide the fact that I had just shit in my pants, and then wupped her ass at FIFA
I was stuffing my vagina with gummy bears last night having him eat them out of me. Team Haribo for the win!
I don't like how my gyno is telling me how to live my life.
he told me that he only likes small dogs. I should have known he was going to end up being little bitch.
HE WILL NEVER BE ONE OF US. HE WILL NEVER BE A DECENT, GOD-FEARING WHORE.
Just cuz you've got the biggest dick I've ever seen doesn't mean u can wake me up at 2 am
Am I the only person in the world that does not give a shit about the avengers?
Randomize
