I just google mapped his house on satellite so i can really see how much money he has. Does that make me shallow?
i have absolutely no control over my now miserable and whore-ish lifestyle.
And a psychic told me I was pregnant and I am just so over life right now.
Excuse me but the alley way I wanted to fuck in happens to be a very nice clean area.
Trying to take a shit right now to the beat of the fuckin drumcircle outside... It's not goin well
Oh I forgot to tell you that while you were in the bathroom last night I made friends with a gay man named Rodger from Venezuela and he kissed me cheek and told me I "knew how to shake my thing". From now on we go to the bathroom as a team.
She called us while she was having sex to ask if we remembered to feed the cat
I dont understand how her boyfriend puts up with her weirdness
One good thing out of all this is her ass is huge. Like Australia Big.
She hash-tagged my name. I think it's safe to say that she remembers our hookup.
What I'm saying is DOWNGRADE. Like, do you see the caps lock?
I mean, except for the part where I was vomiting up pineapple and hot sauce, it was a really fun time.
You put on a bike helmet, yelled "doesn't matter fuck it" then punched a stick the fire
He told me that if he broke my bed my bed durring sex he would take me to ikea, but only on Monday because it's all you can eat meatballs. I think I'm in love.
She's Jesus crazy. And one if not more other forms of crazy. She's 2.5+ crazy.
he sent a dick pic to my best friends phone for me cause mine died lol pretty sure he was regretting that night outta town.
Randomize