shes about as inviting as chlamydia
I just egged your windshield and it froze on contact. Have fun with that.
Like if Robert Downey Jr. and Kiefer Sutherland got together for a bender, that's how drunk I want us to be.
Using his name makes it all too personal. I refuse to get attached to this one. This is all about ass. He doesn't get a name.
I don't think child baring hips is a compliment.
just got the results back. i love his dick even more now i know its clean
Ps. I feel like I may pee myself this weekend. Either drunkenly or out of excitement. Toss up
Not sure. All I know is that she has a tight dark green skirt and I will not rest until I have used my teeth to rip it off of her
oh wow I have been there. Hell one time Matt and I woke up naked with pizza rolls in the bed.
When I tried to give you a hickey, you karate chopped me in the neck.
Yea not today, I ending up taking a shit behind a tree last night.
I woke up today in my boxers hugging a log and realized that I think I've gotten close enough to nature. I really need to stop doing shrooms with you
he gave me a flinstones gummy vitamin and was like, "ya know.. because of ebola."
Well I'm a full service fuck buddy so lemme know if I can get you food or water or anything
Do you wanna do something, or just stare at each other and fantasize about death like we usually do
Randomize
