I heard we made out
he borrowed my computer and saw his name in my recent google searches. Things got awkward real fast.
Ever had blood in your semen? I am guessing that's a problem.
Everything that you guys said happened came back to me. like a tidal wave of regret.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Let's just say trying to drink my weight in apple pie shots looked better in theory.
Asking the homeless man what buss shelter is the warmest was not a good idea
I need a new best friend. Someone who drinks like a fish, hooks up enough to raise eyebrows, and isn't afraid to admit that masturbation is the second best way to spend time. Someone like me! Help me put up posters.
No that one bar I got kicked out of got closed so that technically doesn't count
He drives a PT Cruiser.... that should have been my first clue.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
There's nothing classy about a pregnant girl at a frat party...remember that.
He asked me how many starwars references he could make before i no longer find him attractive.
To describe how high he was he said, " I'm cocked out of my ape sandwich" so yes...that was some pretty good weed.
don’t ask me. i snorted coke off of a pregnancy test box last night. i obviously don’t make the best life choices.
I just had a legitimate orgy. Wearing glowsticks.
Well when I woke up this morning I didn’t think I’d be masturbating to my own LinkedIn profile today but here we are
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