hide the guitars, Nate just learned to play free fallin'
I heard from multiple reliable sources that she doesn't have a gag reflex. Of course I'm going to try to go home with her.
It's like there's a party and my mouth and everyone's throwing up
Why do you keep getting laid in MY dreams
I was informed last night that im not allowed to pick up the bouncers and carry them around anymore. Last sat is starting to make more sense
he's just a really huge penis that sells weed
when was she peeing in the stairwell? why dont i remember this?
....because generally we only remember 40% of the night each, and have to fill eachother in. And that still leaves 20% that we will never know and its probably for the best
I met a bunch of Germans and said in german "this is for the fatherland" and poured a beer on my head
I suppose we should both be prepared for the secret service to come visit us after this conversation. Hi NSA.
the amount of times i have been intoxicated, barefoot, and in a robe at 3 am at the quick check by your house is impressive, especially since i live an hour away
Is this what it's like to be an adult? You plan out play dates for your vagina?
I WOULD NEVER LIE ABOUT SOMETHING AS SERIOUS AS SABADO GIGANTE BEING CANCELED
My intervention, when it happens, should have vanilla cake....buttermilk icing.
Let's just say his oral game was lacking. Hell, lacking is too nice of a word to describe it.
he asked if he should bring the trash can into the room.. apparently i shoved my finger all over his face and said.. shhhh dont talk... just take your pants off.
Randomize
