Texts From Last Night

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  (404): View more from Georgia

  I woke up with a Nike swoosh shaved into my chest hair. my friend got 3 stitches. my phone had a text that simply read "fuck you". I say it was a good party.

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  (404): I woke up with a Nike swoosh shaved into my chest hair. my friend got 3 stitches. my phone had a text that simply read "fuck you". I say it was a good party. http://tfl.nu/j6hi
  Replies (12) Good night (7090) Bad night (917)
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  (513): View more from Ohio

  So i told him he was the 3rd i have ever slept with and then i found out he had actually slept with 5 other girls besides me. And his reply was well your number one on this hand.

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  (513): So i told him he was the 3rd i have ever slept with and then i found out he had actually slept with 5 other girls besides me. And his reply was well your number one on this hand. http://tfl.nu/k6dt
  Replies (26) Good night (6730) Bad night (1287)
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  (919): View more from North Carolina

  If i spent $300 & took that thing home i would hate myself today.

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  (919): If i spent $300 & took that thing home i would hate myself today. http://tfl.nu/n74k
  Replies (8) Good night (661) Bad night (2341)
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  (541): View more from Oregon

  Just think. Tomorrow you'll wake up, shower, and get your brains fucked out. That's your ice cream. Today is your peas and carrots.

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  (541): Just think. Tomorrow you'll wake up, shower, and get your brains fucked out. That's your ice cream. Today is your peas and carrots. http://tfl.nu/feja
  Replies (4) Good night (2942) Bad night (624)
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  (603): View more from New Hampshire

  Luckily my prof thought I was puking from nerves and gave me motivational mini speeches the entire final.

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  (603): Luckily my prof thought I was puking from nerves and gave me motivational mini speeches the entire final. http://tfl.nu/2gn0
  Replies (7) Good night (2565) Bad night (596)
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  (307): View more from Wyoming

  I am going to borrow your water/shock proof video camera for St. Pattys day so that if wake up next to the highway again I know why.

  (303): View more from Colorado

  Ok but I hold the right to any footage of you getting slapped, puking, anything with body shots, and allowed to make a montage of it to put on youtube.

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  (307): I am going to borrow your water/shock proof video camera for St. Pattys day so that if wake up next to the highway again I know why. (303): Ok but I hold the right to any footage of you getting slapped, puking, anything with body shots, and allowed to make a montage of it to put on youtube. http://tfl.nu/4s63
  Replies (3) Good night (1684) Bad night (397)
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  (916): View more from California

  I'm back here naked if anyones wondering

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  (916): I'm back here naked if anyones wondering http://tfl.nu/k937
  Replies (3) Good night (1082) Bad night (378)
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  (908): View more from New Jersey

  I usually don't buy birthday presents for my booty calls

  (1-908): View more from New Jersey

  But you'll make an exception

  (908): View more from New Jersey

  probably not

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  (908): I usually don't buy birthday presents for my booty calls (1-908): But you'll make an exception (908): probably not http://tfl.nu/9drh
  Replies (6) Good night (1547) Bad night (541)
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  (508): View more from Massachusetts

  Last night we got home from the bar and saw a fox outside and we lured it in the house with a piece of cheese. Just wanted to party with some potentially dangerous wildlife I guess.

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  (508): Last night we got home from the bar and saw a fox outside and we lured it in the house with a piece of cheese. Just wanted to party with some potentially dangerous wildlife I guess. http://tfl.nu/kvya
  Replies (7) Good night (1683) Bad night (460)
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  (609): View more from New Jersey

  I woke up with the Dorothy costume at my ankles, both sparkly red shoes on, and clutching ToTo....we're not in Kansas anymore, dude

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  (609): I woke up with the Dorothy costume at my ankles, both sparkly red shoes on, and clutching ToTo....we're not in Kansas anymore, dude http://tfl.nu/hndb
  Replies (10) Good night (1013) Bad night (383)
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  (405): View more from Oklahoma

  Apparently getting a blow job in the mens room from the bar owners daughter will get you kicked out.

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  (405): Apparently getting a blow job in the mens room from the bar owners daughter will get you kicked out. http://tfl.nu/dhlk
  Replies (9) Good night (1632) Bad night (351)
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  (619): View more from California

  So much for doing Irish car bombs in my grandpa's memory.... Asshole.

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  (619): So much for doing Irish car bombs in my grandpa's memory.... Asshole. http://tfl.nu/on15
  Replies (3) Good night (367) Bad night (352)
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  (693): View more from

  You thought you were drunk? I woke up at 6 o'clock this morning with a cheeseburger in my left hand a drink in my right with my window half way down. it was raining.... fml

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  (693): You thought you were drunk? I woke up at 6 o'clock this morning with a cheeseburger in my left hand a drink in my right with my window half way down. it was raining.... fml http://tfl.nu/qfop
  Replies (4) Good night (294) Bad night (487)
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  (519): View more from Ontario

  It has gotten to a point where I just want to sit on his face. Less butterflies, more orgasms.

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  (519): It has gotten to a point where I just want to sit on his face. Less butterflies, more orgasms. http://tfl.nu/hfjv
  Replies (0) Good night (683) Bad night (184)
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  (701): View more from North Dakota

  And then he dove into my vagina like scrooge mcduck into a room of gold

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  (701): And then he dove into my vagina like scrooge mcduck into a room of gold http://tfl.nu/d5yp
  Replies (8) Good night (982) Bad night (178)

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