Texts From Last Night

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  (321): View more from Florida Space Coast

  Why don't I have your new number? And who have I been texting?

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  (321): Why don't I have your new number? And who have I been texting? http://tfl.nu/dyqe
  Replies (4) Good night (686) Bad night (1149)
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  (651): View more from Minnesota

  Why are handjobs necessary in class?

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  (651): Why are handjobs necessary in class? http://tfl.nu/p9nw
  Replies (28) Good night (2465) Bad night (727)
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  (850): View more from Florida

  lesson #67 learned in college: a three day old margarita, is still a margarita.

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  (850): lesson #67 learned in college: a three day old margarita, is still a margarita. http://tfl.nu/5n5t
  Replies (35) Good night (4342) Bad night (924)
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  (850): View more from Florida

  At lowes after workin outside. Kid behind me says "mommy that man smells like a taco" yes she was talking about me.

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  (850): At lowes after workin outside. Kid behind me says "mommy that man smells like a taco" yes she was talking about me. http://tfl.nu/6dky
  Replies (18) Good night (929) Bad night (3799)
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  (610): View more from Pennsylvania

  Whats the name of the guy with his hand down my pants?

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  (610): Whats the name of the guy with his hand down my pants? http://tfl.nu/1myu
  Replies (33) Good night (2130) Bad night (4668)
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  (678): View more from Georgia

  Using manwich sauce as ketchup. Not bad. Love college.

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  (678): Using manwich sauce as ketchup. Not bad. Love college. http://tfl.nu/311k
  Replies (6) Good night (2567) Bad night (1047)
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  (330): View more from Ohio

  giving a 30 min presentation still drunk is like giving birth, upside down in a pit of snakes while being on fire.

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  (330): giving a 30 min presentation still drunk is like giving birth, upside down in a pit of snakes while being on fire. http://tfl.nu/oqcy
  Replies (12) Good night (1496) Bad night (5296)
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  (724): View more from Pennsylvania

  after eating me out, he asked for something to drink. i gave him a glass of water and he said he needed something stronger.

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  (724): after eating me out, he asked for something to drink. i gave him a glass of water and he said he needed something stronger. http://tfl.nu/1s95
  Replies (46) Good night (1486) Bad night (15478)
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  (518): View more from New York

  I had sex on an exercise ball. The inevitable has occurred.

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  (518): I had sex on an exercise ball. The inevitable has occurred. http://tfl.nu/3k1m
  Replies (11) Good night (3821) Bad night (834)
• Favorite

  (626): View more from California

  You said you were going inside to sober up and then you poured yourself a wine glass of warm gin

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  (626): You said you were going inside to sober up and then you poured yourself a wine glass of warm gin http://tfl.nu/mf5k
  Replies (6) Good night (2426) Bad night (1111)
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  (903): View more from Texas

  Your beautifulness. Funnyness. Sexy hairness. Coolness. Plus you ask google how far wendys is from your house. Will you marry me

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  (903): Your beautifulness. Funnyness. Sexy hairness. Coolness. Plus you ask google how far wendys is from your house. Will you marry me http://tfl.nu/adub
  Replies (6) Good night (4162) Bad night (977)
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  (815): View more from Illinois

  He literally sends me dick pictures, EVERY DAY. SEVERAL DIFFERENT ANGLES ..it's like I GET THE POINT.

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  (815): He literally sends me dick pictures, EVERY DAY. SEVERAL DIFFERENT ANGLES ..it's like I GET THE POINT. http://tfl.nu/1ipa
  Replies (10) Good night (967) Bad night (1799)
• Favorite

  (336): View more from North Carolina

  Make sure your heart doesn't explode. These are words of wisdom.

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  (336): Make sure your heart doesn't explode. These are words of wisdom. http://tfl.nu/g9fv
  Replies (2) Good night (1262) Bad night (720)
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  (404): View more from Georgia

  I was to the point where my socks were drenched in ranch dressing

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  (404): I was to the point where my socks were drenched in ranch dressing http://tfl.nu/nbfy
  Replies (25) Good night (911) Bad night (1504)
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  (269): View more from Michigan

  When he pulled it out last night I asked if that was as hard as it was going to get. I think I may have offended him.

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  (269): When he pulled it out last night I asked if that was as hard as it was going to get. I think I may have offended him. http://tfl.nu/ihig
  Replies (5) Good night (340) Bad night (833)

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