Hey baby girl when you gonna let my tongue get up in that ass like i'm an explorer trying to go deep under on a quest for the lost city of atlantis
your text was fucking rediculious. Will let you eat my asshole though.
Now that I'm 21, I feel like I'm letting North Dakota down by not being drunk everyday
i want you to know that after i type the word "your" , vagina is next on my auto correct text
I'm about to play Thunderstruck by myself, that way I'll always get the long thunder part.
this is what happens when you pick a roommate a year in advance.. she ends up hating you for hooking up with for of her extended family members
There's a dead squirrel in the freezer. Is that what you stopped to get out of the road last night?
My fake id got more birthday sex than I've had in my life.
I never forget a pussy, even blackout me gives me that memory.
I'm just saying, I walked in on you blowing a burrito. I now understand how obsessed you are with Taco Bell. And how long it's been since you've got some.
I got so many dick pics last night. It was like a slideshow from heaven.
My boyfriend told me that I said I wanted to "feast on her vagina"... Glad I don't remember.
Long story short, I found someone who takes me seriously when I say I have a Shakespeare kink.
All I did was call him a fucker when he took my pot. He didn't have to arrest me.
I fucked her with a giant balloon tied to my dick. You tell ME how my night went
Ok. Yes. He has a tiny penis. But he also has a trust fund.
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