okay, certainly we can't screw this up, and even as I type, I know we will
Having a race with the dryer. Seeing who can get drunk/dry clothes faster.
its coolsest when we hear the beat in our water bottles. and the likghts are in his eyes now. oh holland
I think my new low is running outside in a towel to pet a particularly fluffy looking squirrel and projectile vomiting off the balcony.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Seriously. My vagina. Can we talk about it? It's gonna jump off this treadmill and devour my trainer.
You got called a pussy at a party with a slow cooker, you can't let that shit slide
Just spread butter on my bathrobe. This has been an ace morning.
If a baby can come out of it, so can four raquetballs.
Yeah, I only wore tennis shoes under the gown. Way cooler than khakis and a shirt, but much more awkward when my parents wanted to go to dinner immediately after the ceremony and my grandmother started to unzip the gown. Stopped her before it was too late, but barely. My dad just rolled his eyes.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Drinking and pointing where stuff needs to go is hard stuff.
Last night someone asked you what your favorite color was and you said "bagel."
I think one of your friend's offered my friend chicken tenders back at his place...just FYI he should probably come up w/ another line
We turned a wake into a bar crawl.
He sends me pictures of his dogs and I send him my tits, it's a win win situation
So if i am talking to a guy and he sends me a pic and he is wearing Spiderman button down dress shirt.... Is it ok if i dont want to talk to him anymore?
Randomize