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Question for you. Are boobs and hands polarly charged, thus causing the inevitable joining of the two. If so are some breasts simply charged backwards
why did u let me go home with him last night?
u were determined it was a good idea
I got so high that I decided to drive with my knees on the way home. Where am I going in life?
Nowhere
I'm okay, they said the swelling should go down in a week. But next time I'm shitwrecked, please make sure to remind me that I can't open a champagne bottle with corkscrew.
you turned on the Care Bears movie at 5am and kept screaming "I CARE"
I had to close one eye to read the questions on my final this morning. That hungover.
Good lord, they've set up every firework to be ignited by a trail of gasoline at midnight. God save us all.
He thought I was flirting with him but really I just needed someone to hold me up.
college stoner meal of the day: microwaved nutrigrain bars
I wish they'd wear their tampons on the outside. At least gimme some warning
Your engaged. Stop telling guys you will sit on their face. They don't always know your kidding.
Our room will be decorated with my urine.
we left the music on while we were fucking. some kanye west song started playing and he started to cry
Its the least I can do really, I mean, I did sleep with her husband...
Nothing like waking up naked and alone on your floor to remind you that you make life mistakes often.
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