you're like the ceasar milan of boners... you understand them on a different level.
Do you ever look at a vegetable and think "that would be awesome to shove up my vagina"?
That Joe Wilson reference just earned you a blow job, Mister!
nah, shes just mad because we went through all her fb pics and tagged her crotch as all the guys shes fucked
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
The more I throw up, the more I am remembering exactly what I drank last night...in order.
okay I may or may not have wrapped my body pillow up in your t-shirt and sprayed it with your axe and am now spooning with it.
again? I'm starting to get a little creeped out now.
Every once in a while you'd chuckle to yourself, and when I asked you what's so funny u replied "sometimes my toes tickle eachother"
that's why you don't digest questionable powders from girls wearing tutus at a dirty club
come find me. Outside the bar we were just in waving my syringe in the air
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Hey history final, how's it feel to be raped in the ass by my steel cock of ACADEMIC PERFECTION?
you are way too vulgar to be a girl
I refuse to apologize. Any dick that comes that close to my face uninvited is gonna get bit
I'll never forget how blunt of a wingman you were. "Excuse me, my friend wants to makeout with someone"
You did it first. I was merely expressing my support for you, by pressing my testicles against a window.
It's a strange mix of shame and pride every time I pee at the bar and still see my lipstick on the bathroom wall...
I have bite marks all over my ass. Is that an acceptable excuse for missing class?
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