Whenever I'm sad I just imagine if babies were born with mustaches...
i'm at sigma nu and gary is here. what do it do?
Stay away from his face.
so i go for his dick?
I just realized i masturbated to the home shopping network. I either need to get a boyfriend asap, or a subscription to a porn website, or i just need to stop taking ambien
You know what sound is wonderful for a hangover? Listening to the horns from the South Africans at the world cup
I cannot even. Taco bell reception. Beers. New friends from Georgia.
No. My vagina is not the scapegoat for your poor decisions.
Come over so we can hookup and eat tacos. Those are 2 things you can't possibly turn down.
so, she was so drunk she tried stabbing me with a corn dog stick
Also, any YOLOwl-related sex photos will result in you winning ten orgasms, courtesy of myself, as well as sweets and bacon-based dinner. All entrants welcome
I wouldn't blame my organs if they just decided to quit working after this weekend
I just KNEW this was gonna happen. NEVER say "all the free Jameson you can drink" around Tina.
We broke into the kitchen, stole cooking aprons, and wore them on the dance floor.
Just used the pen i got in my signing ceremony to pack down my bowl. coach would be proud
For now I'm a single mom monday-thursday and a drunk looking for dick the rest of the week
... and this time i WILL NOT make out with anyone dressed as batman.
Randomize
