Lost. The hour! Funtime!!!!
I only want to know people that are dynamic intelligent and totally insane
I woke up with my face in a pile of pancakes and 3000 mistakes.
I just used my thong as a hair tie. I think I reached my limit.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
then he compared my vagina to a dishwasher. A DISHWASHER?!
Just did lines off your face, congrats on getting in the magazine bro
there's chocolate cake in my bathtub.. I don't even want to know how the hell chocolate cake wound up in my tub..
If you can find a Canadian Lesbian to have pity sex with me, let me know.
I was grinding on people that were grinding. Nonconsensual.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Just discovered evidence of drunken eBay bid. Drunk Mike did pretty good -- I'm getting a new sleeping bag.
I'm trying to be sexual and you're sending me smashmouth lyrics
I think I'd rather see her get hit by a car in one of those Russian dash cam videos on YouTube.
Im drinking a CAN of bud light at the bar. Do you really think I care anymore?
I can't really text bc it's too expensive but I thought youd like to know I just shit myself in a gift shop.
sometimes u just gotta ride a dildo and forget about life
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