love how google fills in search terms for you, today for example, i ran a query for "why do girls get t"
and google finished it w/ "ramp stamps."
I felt less weird knowing others had searched this before me.
Good seeing you too. Don't worry, you didn't miss out on too much last night. We went to a place where there was supposed to be a wet t-shirt contest, but it was more like two ugly girls dancing around on stage in white shirts. Everyone just wanted them to leave so the band could keep playing
I remember why I come home for the holidays. Sam Adams is the cheapest beer in the fridge
I hate it when she philosophizes drunkenly on my kitchen counter. not even sober do i understand latin.
You kept saying "sir officer" which would have been polite and helped you if it wasn't a female. She was pissed.
I have a question: does pizza dipped in chili sound good or am I just really high?
UPDATE: WE WILL BE HITTING THE BATMAN PINATA WITH A SWORD
HELP A SISTER OUT. AND KEEP YOUR TONGUE OUT OF THE HUMMUS.
TOO HIGH TO FIGURE THIS SHIT OUT
Dunno why I keep hitting snooze. It's never gonna give me the kind of sleep I need to be sober.
I'm your Election Erection Connection
I retroactively revoke all sex we've ever had.
idk i just feel really unsatisfied. like something's missing from my life... maybe it's chicken nuggets...
I know you like got hit by a car but do you want to come to my birthday pardi
He ran out to tell us that somebody flooded the bathroom, then went back in there fell on his ass and asked why the floor was wet
I'm disappointed in the internet. It's two days and there's still no fanfiction based off that Manning/Beckham commercial.
You don't even like football
college girl with braces trying to flirt with you...time to go
Randomize
