If a woman tells you she has been pink socked...don't move forward with her.
But i did once see a show where a women was homeless and installed a stove in a school bus so she and her baby could live there since all the seats were taken out. As far as being homeless goes it didn't look half bad...So this is me promising to you that if i ever am living in an abandoned school bus...i will at least pimp it out with a stove so you can come over for dinner sometimes
You had a beer at 10:30 this morning?
Ya, I didn't have any Tylenol.
i just google searched 'can you pop your ovary'
he was wearing a tuxedo, i was naked...it's a long story.
You just kept mumbling, "Shit shit shit, the muffin man owes me money." Repeatedly.
Bath mats should not be used at mops. they don't work. consider this a drunk psa
you know, this Evan Williams whiskey isn't so bad when it's watered down a bit and you're home by yourself on a Saturday listening to Snoop Dog alone in your apartment without pants or any plans for your future...
I dont know if this is a good time to tell you but im actually a freshman.. not a senior
I just looked at a girl and was like what disease does she have? And then my mind caught up ohhh shes pregnant.
You gotta pick a side. My suggestion: side with tits.
My head is pounding and I need an ice pack for my vag. Successful friendsgiving!
Jesus himself couldn't make a better sandwich
Dude mama brought home the bacon, i got his HBO account i guess that makes up for his by par skills in bed.
I burned my tit while he banged me and it was still the best kitchen sex EVER!!!
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